punchandkiss | Eleventh Viking Charge [ Video]

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Eleventh Viking Charge [ Video]

[When the camera clicks on, rather than show Astrid, it shows a wide, grassy field. About twenty feet away, sitting in the grass, is Hiccup, next to his Salamance, apparently talking to it and not doing anything else. After maybe thirty seconds of this, the gear turns around to reveal Astrid, looking rather annoyed. Her Sentret, Fuzzball, is perched on her shoulder.]

I need to know how to snap a stupid boy out of a funk.

All he does is sit around staring at his gear or talking to his dragon or talking about that Clair trainer! Or talking to his dragon about that Clair trainer. Or just sitting there thinking about that Clair trainer! That's it!

[No she's not jealous, shut up.]

He's not training enough or doing anything and keeping his attention for more than five minutes is impossible!

[She almost shouts that last bit, and then catches herself and sighs.]

I just need to snap him out of it, that's all.

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[Quite frankly, Adder isn't too thrilled about this arrangement, either. Sure, she's happy that Hiccup trusts and confides in her, but after the fifth or sixth "And she trains dragons on top of all that," it starts to get a little tiring! Still, she waits patiently through him worrying about what he should be wearing to the prom, and through his wondering what Clair is going to be wearing before huffing out an exasperated sigh. Really, Hiccup, this was reaching levels of ridiculousness she didn't know existed.

Luckily, Eve makes the Pokegear's screen blink a few minutes after Astrid's video hits the network, and it just manages to catch their trainer's attention. After watching the video, looking around with a confused expression and spotting Astrid, he finally replies.

...In video, because wow Astrid, you were being too rude to have him talk to you in person.]

I'm pre-tty sure you're exaggerating.

[Adder harumphs again. She wasn't.]

...Seriously?

[She alternates between glaring at him on the screen, and glaring at his back.]

Can you tell me the last conversation we had that was longer than five minutes and wasn't about that dragon trainer girl?

[And he will just be looking back over to her, apparently offended.

...Until he really can't come up with something. Give him a minute. Just, uh... Yeah. Switching back to looking at the screen, now.]

Well, it's not like I can remember everything I say, Astrid. I'm sure we didn't talk about her that long at breakfast, right?

[RIGHT?]

We didn't talk at all at breakfast! You stared out the window and then left!

I did?

[That couldn't be right. He could distinctly remember complimenting a lovely lady, and--

Oh. Oh wait. Right, he had been thinking about meeting Clair at the prom.

Oops.]

Okay, fine, but that's one day. Not even a full day! [Nothing to complain to all of Johto/Kanto about.] Why are you getting so worked up about it, anyway?

It's been a lot more than one day, Hiccup. You've been like this since you heard about her!

[Shut up she is not jealous.]

It has not been a month.

[Better believe he remembers the day he heard about this dragon-taming temptress. ~~It was his birthday, how could he forget.~~ Also believe that he doesn't believe Astrid, because that would just be ridiculous.]

Weeks, at least. At least.

It's so annoying.

Have you tried talking to him about it?

Sometimes people don't realize they're in a funk unless someone else points it out to them.

[...Welp. Even if he thought it couldn't have possibly been that long, he's at least aware enough to feel guilty.]

Okay. Well, you've got my attention now, so, uh...

What's up?

[... Oho~ Sounds like somebody is jealous. Clearly it's the time for Crow Hogan's Absolutely Useless Relationship Advice Hour™!]

And I bet you'd rather he was paying attention to you, huh?

[Astrid wasn't actually expecting that. So there's sort of a deer in headlights moment going on.]

Uh.

...Have you been training?

He doesn't hear anything I say, or he wanders off, lost in thought.

What? No!

I just want him to go back to normal!

[Hiccup is not so surprised. Training is to Astrid as Clair apparently is to him. Ah well.]

Some. Not as much as usual, I guess, but Helga's hit the level limit, now.

[Which had been his goal, after hearing Carmen's Haunter troubles.]

Have you tried locking the door so he can't wander off?

[He's only half joking.]

...This is a friend of yours I take it?

[She's just bad at small talk and wanted attention has absolutely no idea how to put that into words, that's all.]

...Good. Uh.

[She sighs.]

So does this mean you're done obsessing or is this going to go on until that stupid dance thing?

...No...

[She isn't quite certain how to answer that so she just nods.]

It's Hiccup.

[It's understandable. Back home, conversation consisted of a lot of grunting, for most. Didn't prepare these young viking minds for "real" talking.]

I, uh, thought you wanted to go five minutes without talking about it. [Yep, he sure is looking up from the 'gear over to where she is and shooting her a bemused expression.] But, like I said, I don't think I'm obsessing over her. And the prom doesn't sound stupid.

Uh-huh~

[He totes believes you, really.]

No worries! Clair's just a whiny little bitch, so if your boy's got at least one semi-functional brain cell in that head of his, he'll be over with her in no time.

Perhaps we should think of something else to draw his attention.

[Oh good, someone else with boy problems, let's just go with her first thought in mind.]

Punch him.

[Wait that's not right.]

I mean, it would snap him out of his silly funk. A spar. Or something, maybe a battle? [Jane that's still not right but it's already said so oops.]

...Maybe you could...slap him?

[She just glares right back at him.]

You think about her all the time, you talk about her all the time.

And yes it is it's a bunch of people dancing.

I don't know. She trains dragons, that's all it really takes to get Hiccup's attention.

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[audio] yes let's be jealous girls together

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